Writer • Creative Director • Strategist
The Whole Standard
I don’t wear outdoor shoes inside my home.By the entryway, I have a floor mat to step on and a shoe organizer. They are simple, intentional, and keep my home feeling clean.When service providers visit, I don’t expect them to take their shoes off, so I keep disposable shoe covers by the front door.Here’s the problem I realized recently: I had a standard, but I didn’t fully support it.I was mandating shoe covers, but, I wasn’t providing everything needed to make that process smooth. I didn’t provide a dedicated garbage bin for the used covers.Because of this, visitors were awkwardly walking out of my home; still wearing the covers, unsure of where to toss them, or just keeping them because they liked the quality (which was cute, but still not the point).My implementation was good but it wasn’t complete.One afternoon, I remembered that I had an extra trashcan in the bathroom. I didn’t want a bathroom bin sitting in my foyer, but, something told me to check anyway. When I opened it, I found a small inner trash bin that was simple, clean, and the perfect size for the entryway.I placed the bin beside the shoe rack and it fit so effortlessly that I had to laugh.Overall, my structure wasn’t wrong, it was just incomplete. Once I filled the gap, everything clicked into place.— Gran.Fanm.Kiki
Halfway Isn’t Closure
Recently, I unlocked and opened a window.When it came time to close it, the lock wouldn’t budge. The window was fully shut, but the lock refused to click into place.I stepped back and noticed something I had completely overlooked, there were two locks.The first lock was the one giving me trouble. Instead of fighting with it, I moved down to the second lock and closed it easily. For a moment, I almost convinced myself that maybe the first lock was just stubborn by design and never meant to close all the way.Something in me said, “try again”.With the confidence from closing the second lock, I went back to the first one… and it clicked effortlessly!What changed? Not the lock. Me.Once I stopped forcing the situation and allowed myself a moment of ease, I was able to return with more clarity, more patience, and more alignment.Sometimes we convince ourselves that “halfway” is good enough, but, deep down, we know we’re settling.I’m glad I didn’t leave that lock halfway.
I’m glad I pushed through.The moment I did, it reminded me of who I am: someone who finishes what she starts.— Gran.Fanm.Kiki
Precision
A friend of mine recently told me that she unintentionally forwards all her work calls to a random extension.Everyday, she sanitizes her desk phone with a disinfecting wipe. In the process of vigorously wiping the surface, she ends up pressing random buttons.Naturally, I suggested something simple: instead of forcefully wiping the phone, why not clean it intentionally? A gentle wipe over and around the buttons would get the job done, without creating a new problem in the process.This reminds me of how we’re taught to brush our teeth. Not with aggressive scrubbing, but with controlled and intentional strokes. When you use too much force, you don’t clean better, you injure yourself.Life works the same way.We often rush, push, scrub, and force our way through things assuming that effort equals effectiveness; but, precision is rarely about pressure, it’s about presence.Sometimes the softest touch gives the clearest result.Sometimes the gentlest approach creates the strongest outcome.Sometimes the work isn’t to push harder, but to act with intention.In life, it’s not just about what you do, it’s also about how you do it.— Gran.Fanm.Kiki
Buy 1, Get 1 Free
I was shopping online at one of my favorite retail stores. I was indecisive about purchasing a beautiful satin lounge set and robe, so I decided to check out without them.A few weeks later, I ended up at an outlet mall where that same store had a location. The moment I walked in, I felt overstimulated so I turned around and left. I walked into a jewelry store instead to try on watches. For security purposes, they held onto my driver’s license while I tried items on. Eventually, I went home and enjoyed the rest of my weekend… completely forgetting that they still had my ID.The following week, the jewelry store called to let me know my drivers license was still in their possession. I was a little annoyed because I barely go to that mall but, I also trusted the universe. I have a backup license, so it wasn’t an emergency. Part of me wanted to ask them to just mail it but something in my spirit said, “No, go.” So I went.When I arrived at the mall, I decided to walk back into the retail store I had previously rushed out of. Within seconds, I spotted the same satin robe and lounge set I saw online and now they were significantly cheaper because it was the outlet store. I tried each item on, loved them even more, and made my purchase.Later, when reviewing the receipt, I realized the cashier had forgotten to charge me for one of the items. Shhhh!Ultimately, this wasn’t about the price. This was a reminder that sometimes the universe gifts us in ways we don’t expect.— Gran.Fanm.Kiki
Table for 2, Please.
Recently, I met up with my realtor for dinner on a Friday night. We picked the time in advance, so I made the reservation ahead of schedule.On the day of, she ran a few minutes late, so I let the hostess know and waited in the seating area nearby.We’ve both eaten at this restaurant more times than I can count, it’s known for its incredible food and vibrant atmosphere. Part of me was worried that she wouldn’t be able to hear the important things I wanted to share with her.When she arrived, the hostess led us to our table. To my surprise, we were guided into a section of the restaurant I had never seen before, a newly added garden room. It was quiet, cozy, and intimate; a completely different world from the busy main dining area.I was excited to experience something new, but even happier knowing I wouldn’t have to raise my voice just to be heard. This was a small blessing, but a meaningful one.And then I wondered:If she had arrived on time, would we have been seated here? Did the timing (her delay, my waiting), align perfectly so we could experience something better than we planned for?What’s meant for you will always find you. Sometimes, the delay is the direction.Trust the process.— Gran.Fanm.Kiki
Work: Busy vs. Purpose
There’s a big difference between being busy and being in motion.I would apply to jobs out of habit, not because I actually wanted them, but because it made me feel like I was “doing something”. On the other hand, every time I worked on my projects (my column, my brand, my creative direction), I felt more alive than I ever did sending out another résumé.The work that lights you up isn’t busy work, it’s purpose work. Purpose work often doesn’t look productive in the traditional sense. It’s quieter. It’s deeper. It’s alignment in motion.I’m building something real, something that reflects me. Even though it’s still taking shape, I can feel the momentum.What feels like waiting is really just becoming.— Gran.Fanm.Kiki
My Presence
In an age where every milestone is announced and every achievement is posted, there’s something quietly powerful about choosing discretion.I’ve never felt the need to tell people what I do for work and I don’t feel pressured to explain my lifestyle or credentials. When people meet me, they can feel the peace in my demeanor and the quality of my environment; that says more than a title or a salary ever could.Over time, I’ve learned that mystery is elegant. Let people draw their own conclusions. Success isn’t about proving anything, it’s about living authentically and finding fulfillment on your own terms.Not everyone will understand the value of quiet confidence, but that’s the beauty of it. The right people will sense your substance without you ever having to announce it.Real success doesn’t shout. It simply shows up.— Gran.Fanm.Kiki
Effortless Elegance
Effortless elegance isn’t magic, it’s preparation you don’t see. From subtle details like a clean and inviting space to the small touches that make guests feel welcomed, maintaining an environment that is put-together requires ongoing care and intentionality.The same principle applies to how we show up in life. Effortless beauty, confidence, and alignment don’t happen overnight. Whether it’s hair, wardrobe, or personal routines, the polished appearance we aspire to is built on consistent, behind-the-scenes work. Skincare, hydration, fitness, wardrobe choices; these daily habits allow us to step into the world looking and feeling like our best selves without scrambling at the last minute.Think of it like preparing for a vacation: you don’t get a “bikini body” one month before your trip. It’s the consistent lifestyle choices such as healthy eating, workouts, and self-care that make it feel effortless when the moment arrives. The same goes for life in general, consistency is the secret that turns preparation into presence.This mindset also applies to the way we manage our personal space. My home, for example, is maintained at a standard that feels polished and welcoming. When guests arrive, it’s ready without a frantic last-minute push. The work is done ahead of time, invisibly, creating calm, pride, and confidence for both myself and the people I welcome into my space.Ultimately, the lesson is simple: stay ready, so you don’t have to get ready. Alignment, elegance, and confidence feel effortless not because there’s no work involved, but because the work has been done consistently behind the scenes. Once you make preparation a habit, what looks effortless on the surface becomes your natural standard.— Gran.Fanm.Kiki
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